Are You Ready To Get Engaged?
4 Important Things To Know

There is no denying that, sometimes, when you know, you just know. It's that "I-just-slipped-on-the-most-amazing-outfit-for-girls-night-out" feeling. Except, it's not slipping on an outfit; it's finding the right guy. Oh, and it's not for a girls night out; it's for forever.

You have found The One and are eagerly anticipating a future of wedded bliss. It is important to take some time to be a little introspective as you consider engagement, and also talk through some "hot ticket" items with your main squeeze (we'll get to those shortly). A little prep work up front paves the way for a peaceful, FUN engagement!

1. Self Reflection

It is easy to get swept away in the magic of being in love - it's fun to imagine the future with your partner and dream together; however, it's also important to guide Cloud 9 to the ground for a bit to dig through some real-life questions before taking the Next Big Step. Here are some things to think about as you continue along this journey.

  • Do you bring out the best in each other? Are you a healthier, happier person because of this relationship?
  • Do you get along with each other's friends and family? Of course, this is not necessarily a deal breaker, but if there IS discord among your loved ones and your beloved, take some time to identify any red flags.
  • Do you want to change your partner? Everyone has bad habits, but if you are hoping for a life transformation from your significant other after you tie the knot, pause. It is one thing to grow WITH someone and another thing to wish they would become someone completely different.
  • Do you feel the need to check his phone or social media accounts? Trust is paramount in a marriage. If there is not mutual respect and commitment, it may not be the right time yet.

Make sure you are moving forward for all the right reasons; it really is that important. It's easy to get swept up in the idea of happily ever after without having your real Prince Charming at hand.

2. Date Night Discussions

Use some of the QT on your date nights to talk through some hot-topic issues that will most definitely have an impact on your relationship down the road. These topics have the potential to be a bit emotionally-charged, so set some ground rules up front, but definitely do not be afraid to dig deep. It's best to push through the issues now rather than when you've invested so, so much (emotionally, physically, mentally, etc.) years down the road. Here are just a few "hot ticket" items we feel should be broached prior to making a very public commitment to each other for life:

  • Faith - How do you both feel about the role it will play in your lives together?
  • Careers - Do you know each other's career goals and what it will take to reach those?
  • Money - Is one of you a saver and one of you a spender? How will you make financial decisions?
  • Kids - Do you both want kids? If so, how soon?
  • Stress - How do you each handle stressful situations?
  • Arguments - Do you two fight fairly? What are your conflict resolution methods?
  • The future - Are you both up for travel and relocating? Where you do want to settle?
  • Politics - How strongly do you feel about a certain political party? Would it be a deal breaker for you if the person you loved felt strongly about a different party?

Hammering out the logistics on these topics can help circumvent any future problems. Hard as it may be to imagine right now (listen sweetie, you're in the honeymoon phase), marriage isn't all unicorns and rainbows. There will inevitably be issues down the road and you don't want one of the items above to be one of them!

3. Keep Calm and Fiancé On

Once you have that ring on your finger, life as you know it will change. Get ready for a whirlwind of celebrations, amplified emotions, and memorable moments. Here are a few tips to keep in mind in the midst of the flurried excitement:

  • Everyone and their mom (and especially your mom!) will want to see that sparkler on your left hand. . .over and over again. Get a manicure. Treat your nails to a little TLC so that ring shines in every picture.
  • Forget that fantasy proposal story you had in your head or saw on YouTube. Your story is better because it's YOURS, and nobody else's. Decide which parts you want to tell and which parts you will keep private, and own it.
  • As soon as that ring is on your finger, the world will want the scoop on every detail of your wedding. Don't be afraid to tell them to slow their roll. Enjoy being engaged. Take a breath (and a glass of champagne) and ease into the planning process.
  • Your inner circle (and anyone who has ever gotten married…or wanted to) will be so excited for you, and they may all jump in with their expert opinions about planning a wedding. Don't forget that this is about YOU and your beloved. Choose your own path.

4. Social Media Etiquette

To piggyback on the above topic, it's important to remember that as excited as others are bound to be to hear about your special news, you will likely be just as excited to share it on social media (yes, all of them). This is tricky. Or can be tricky if you're a big social sharer. We recommend you follow these tips:

  • First and foremost, make sure you both have personally contacted close family and friends. While 3rd cousin Betty might not be upset to read about the news on Facebook, your sister Sally is going to be livid (and rightfully hurt) if she stumbles upon the news on the Book before she hears it from your first.
  • Create one, streamlined message and share it on all of your feeds. One time. And that's it.
  • Don't be rushed to share the news with the world. Give you and your fiance time to enjoy the fleeting moment (put your phone down. No, really. Put. It. Down)
  • Save the ring pics. We know you love that beauty on your left hand, but it is a little tacky to share unwarranted or unrequested ring pics on social media.

Becoming engaged is a huge life milestone that you won't soon forget. From the story of the proposal (and how he asked your dad for permission. . . eek) and calling friends and family to the many, many wonderful celebrations to follow, your future engagement will inevitably throw you down a whirlwind road (and that's a great thing).

Afterall, your engagement is the first excerpt in your story as soon-to-be husband and wife. Lay the groundwork today so that the story goes on and on and covers all of life's amazing moments that are sure to follow you and your loved one.

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